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dear bully….

Dear Bully,


I want you to know that we’re cool now,  you and I.  I’ve moved on from our past experiences and I hope you have too.  I forgive you for hurting me.   But before I go, I have something deep in my heart I need to write you about.


I’m writing to you on behalf of my son.   I don’t know how to say it, other than to beg you not to hurt him.   It would kill me inside if he was hiding himself in his coat on the way home from school so no one could see his tears… including me.   It would break my heart if I knew you and your friends cornered him in the bathroom.   It would anger me if your words caused him to doubt his talents, and worse?…. if he gave up, just because of your foolishness.


And honestly, I don’t know what I would do if I got a call one day saying that he took his life… all because of YOUR actions…. and YOUR words.   Just YOU.  If he could hear your voice and not the voice of all the others who believed in him and loved him…. if he cared that much about YOU and what you thought…. I’d be beside myself.


I’d have too many questions…

What made you so dominant over his life?

Why would he care about what you think?

How could you ever do that to anyone?

Could you live with yourself now?

Would it change your actions?  Or would you be so numb to not even care?….


The roller coaster of emotions that would flood my soul would be hard to manage.   My value system and the feelings I would struggle with would be in constant battle for rule over my heart.  I can’t lie, I’d want you to pay for your actions.  I wouldn’t want to be merciful.  I would struggle forgiving you.  I would be angry, saddened beyond comfort, sorry for you, sorry for the life lost for nothing, and hopeless.   I’d be tainted and skeptical of any good in the world.   Grief would haunt me.


But here we are…..  my son is alive, and I thank God for every moment I have with him.  Other parents haven’t been so lucky.  You’re lack of compassion has visited their children and now…. there’s no going back.


I can’t always be there when you confront my son.  But I am committed to raising him to be able to stand firm if you ever decide to come around.   As he grows older, I will be teaching him how to love and respect himself and others – how he can be empathy’s advocate.   I will teach him about his God, who has a destiny for his life.


And then… I will pray.  I will pray for him with my all my heart – for God to protect him and show him the way when I’m not there.


And then…. I will pray…. for you.  I will pray that whatever caused you to ever feel you needed to act so cruel, that God would somehow reach past your hard exterior, into the depths of your soul, and show you…. love.  Love that you never knew existed.   Sometimes, that’s something only God can do.   And if I ever have the chance, I hope I can show you what that love and acceptance looks like….


Categories: The Bully Project
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